Gail Gardner is a pastoral counselor, advocate, listener, writer, and survivor of sexual violence. One of the phrases Gail says she often hears from survivors is: “there was no one there for me.” After experiencing both supportive and unsupportive reactions to what happened to her, Gail knows how much of a difference it can make when someone listens and believes you. “Telling your story will be the beginning of your healing. You will see light at the end of the tunnel.”

Brad Simpson was groomed and sexually abused by a private sports trainer from age nine to his mid-teens. He didn’t tell anyone about the abuse for the next 35 years. “It was scary; I was afraid of judgement most of all. I had feelings of guilt, and I struggled with self esteem and trying to hide my story.”

Sharon Billings was sexually assaulted and abused by her husband over the course of four years. It started with controlling behavior and emotional abuse and escalated to become increasingly violent. “The biggest thing for me was when I got to the point where I could let go of responsibility for my husband’s actions. I held myself accountable for a long time.”

Debra was just 15 years old when the abuse began. It can be difficult for an individual to disclose sexual assault or abuse when they know the perpetrator. It can be especially difficult if the perpetrator is a family member.

Adam had always enjoyed spending time with his uncle, and would often look forward to sleepovers when they could have extended time together. On one of these occasions when he was 14, their normal activities turned abusive. He was confused by his uncle’s actions; nothing like this had happened before.